HB363

House Bill 363 is a bill which would allow Utah Schools to drop sex education classes, and prohibit them from teaching about contraception if they choose to keep sex education classes at all.  Research shows this is not the direction we ought to be moving.

I understand the reasoning, that we don't want to give young people the impression that we approve of them becoming sexually active at young ages, or outside of marriages, but we have got to put the practicality and health and safety of our young people ahead of our ideology.  This bill is a message bill, and the message it sends is that our ideology matters more than our youth.

There are going to be young people who have sex before we'd like them to.  By not even talking about it, not only are we not preparing them to be responsible when they choose to have sex, but we're not even giving them tools to wait for sex either.

I'm deeply disappointed by the vote our state house has made today, and encourage everyone to contact their senators and ask them to vote no on this bill.  It's a mistake, and we owe our youth better.

Here's a great article on why Abstinence Plus education is the most effective.  Send the link to your senator, and let your House representative know that you're disappointed by his or her vote.

Doing the best we can- the hummingbird challenge

So often I feel overwhelmed with what I see as unfixable problems.  There are a lot of things that I, on my own will never be able to fix.  But, like the hummingbird, I can do the best that I can.



This clip was from the documentary Dirt.  It was really interesting, and I think I could (and will) watch it over and over again.  It talks about what dirt is, and our relationship with it.  As we forget its importance, and allow it to become damaged, it stops nourishing us with healthy food.  I was talking to my aunt and she mentioned how her stepson wouldn't eat carrots for a long time after seeing our grandmother pull them out of the garden.  We've become so accustomed to seeing our food in neat little packages at the store that we've forgotten where food comes from.  In an effort to produce more to meet the endless demands of cheaper food, the quality of our soil has decreased as we pump pesticides and herbicides into it.  Our way of life is not sustainable, and eventually we will be forced to make changes.

I believe that God put us on the earth to learn and to grow.  Part of that growth and learning, is learning to be good stewards of the life around us.  That includes the dirt.

It's not practical for everyone to stop buying corn fed beed, or switch to organic foods.  However, like the hummingbird, even if we can't completely change how we eat, we can do what we can.  If that means growing our own garden, great!  If it means buying locally produced meats (Christensen's Family Farm in my side link sells grass fed beef and pork!), then do it!  If it means you switch one meal, or one meal more, each week from a meat based meal to a vegetarian one, it can make a difference (plus vegetarian meals are often cheaper).  If it means you find organic gardening and yard care solutions, great!

So my challenge to all five of you who read my blog, is be a hummingbird.  Find something you can do to put out the fire.  How will you respond to the hummingbird challenge?

Giving

Perhaps the rest of the year, when I don't think so much about buying STUFF, it's easier to not think about those who can't buy necessities, let alone, STUFF.  It hurts my heart to think of anyone sleeping outside right now.  I just walked around the corner to pick my preschooler up from his playgroup, and by the time I got home my fingers were freezing.  


If it hurts your heart too, consider making a donation to The Road Home.  You can donate money online, you can also drop off in-kind donations at:

 210 South Rio Grande Street (455 West)

Salt Lake City

Some of the things they need the most are: all sizes of hats, jackets, coats, socks, (new) underwear, blankets, larger sizes of diapers, towels, pillows.  There is a whole list of things they are in need of.

Pork Chops

Several months ago I posted about my thoughts after reading Animal Vegetable Miracle, by Barbara Kingsolver, and In Defense of Food, by Michael Pollan, and also watching Food Inc.

Food Inc. especially really got to me, and made me think about what we are eating, and what the real costs of our food are. Rates of diet related illnesses keep going up, which is turn pushes up the cost of health care for everyone. The way the food we eat is grown or raised should really be considered. Is it sustainable? Can we continue to live the way we do and take care of the earth like we have been commanded to?

Back in December I started looking around for local sources for sustainably raised meats. At the time, the only things I could find were beef (which we don't need, because we get our "beef" from hunting), and pork. My family went in on a pig, and we picked it up on saturday.

Sunday for dinner, we cooked some pork chops (sprinkled with garlic salt and lemon pepper), made gravy from the drippings in the pan, ate the last of our indoor-salad-garden, made mashed potatoes, and steamed some carrots and broccoli with a little lemon pepper. It was the best dinner I've eaten in awhile. Here's a couple of the pork chops pre cooking...


And here are some while they're cooking (we experimented with the cast iron pan and the regular pan- the cast iron seemed to brown the outsides nicer than the regular frying pan, but the regular frying pan was better for making gravy out of the drippings)...


The last time we had pork chops was several years ago when they were on sale at costco, I don't remember them being anywhere near as flavorful.

We ordered a whole pig from Christiansen Family Farm, and recently placed an order for some chickens as well. The neatest thing is that they've added a CSA option, where you can pay, and then receive enough meat for your family for the whole year (I think you can break up the deliveries so you don't have to store everything in your freezer). They offer grass fed beef, pork, chicken and turkey. The CSA's come in 3 different sizes depending on how big your family is or how much meat you eat.

They also have a blog, and it's fun to read through about their experiences living on a farm, and including their small children in the farm chores.

There but by the grace of God go I

Saturday night my Mister and I went out to dinner and then to a movie with friends. We ate at the Rio Grande, I hadn't been there before, but it was so good that I ate more than I should have. The movie was also enjoyable. On the walk back to the car, my stomach hurt from eating too much and I was shivering because it was cold, and I made the comment that there's "nothing worse than having a full stomach and shivering", to which I immediately added, "except maybe an empty stomach and shivering". We were walking near the Road Home shelter, where people were lined up waiting to get in. I don't know if everyone did, or if some people spent the night on the street.

I felt selfish and wasteful to have spent money on a night out, when there are people who have no place to spend a night in. It's so easy to go about our lives and not think about the homeless.

From their website: The Road Home provides support and shelter for overcoming homelessness. We have a wide variety of programs that provide services to people. The Road Home operates out of The Salt Lake Community Shelter, the largest homeless shelter in Utah.

We begin by providing people with basic needs such as food, clothing and shelter, while immediately working with them to develop a plan for housing. Our programs are designed to connect people with resources and help integrate them back into the community.

Housing Programs
Emergency Services
Self-Sufficiency Programs
Advocacy/Collaboration

You can donate money online here, or you can go here for a list of items they are in need of. There are also opportunities for volunteering, including Eagle Scout projects.

That homelessness exists shows how far we need to come in truly caring for the least of these. The homeless are one of society's most vulnerable populations. If I can afford to go out to eat and to a movie, I can make room in my budget to support emergency shelters in hopes that someday no one has to spend a cold night on the street.

Where to Get Milk?

As I've been researching meat and the sustainability and health issues surrounding the way most meats are "grown" currently, I've also been looking at milk. I read an article on webmd that was a study on children fed organic dairy products versus traditional dairy products, the study found that children who ONLY consumed organic dairy products had a much lower rate of asthma and allergies than children who at any amount of traditional dairy products in their diet. I'm not quite ready to switch to organic dairy entirely (and I think in the article, it wasn't just the organic label that was important, it was that the dairy cows were pastured, therefore healthier, and didn't need antibiotics- antibiotics being my biggest concern).

I've been doing some reading on milk and where it comes from. Costco organic milk is a "great deal" at nearly $3 per half gallon. Unfortunately, today I read this: wholesalers and major "organic" brands are continuing to sell milk and dairy products labeled as "USDA Organic, even though most or all of their milk is coming from factory farm feedlots where the animals have been brought in from conventional farms and are kept in intensive confinement, with little or no access to pasture.

The Organic Consumers Association is expanding its boycott of Horizon and Aurora organic dairy products to include five national "private label" organic milk brands supplied by Aurora, as well as two leading organic soy products, Silk and White Wave, owned by Horizon's parent company, Dean Foods...Aurora Organic supplies milk for several private label organic milk brands, including Costco's "Kirkland Signature," Safeway's "O" organics brand, High Meadows, Giant's "Natures Promise," and Wild Oats organic milk. Aurora Organic received a failing grade from the Cornucopia Institute's survey of organic dairies for its practice of intensive confinement of dairy cows. For pictures of Aurora Organic's operations, follow this link. The Cornucopia Institute recently blew the whistle on Aurora Organic's greenwashing and its bogus certification of animal welfare.

Additionally, its been revealed that much of the soy for Dean Food's White Wave tofu and Silk soymilk products are sourced abroad, primarily from Brazil and China. Environmental standards and workers' rights are routinely violated in these two countries.

Anyone know of sources for milk that comes from cows not treated with routine antibiotics? Costco was going to be my source for milk. I don't care about the organic label, I just haven't found any non-organic milk that meets my requirements.

It's making me tired.

UPDATE: I think we're going to go with Rosehill dairy. It's a local, small scale dairy, and I feel fairly comfortable with the way the cows are raised and fed, and with the quality of the milk.

Changing the way we live

I've been thinking a lot lately about why we do things the way we do. Why we buy the things we buy, and eat the things we eat. And why we're so hesitant to look at other options, and so quick to laugh and label different ideas as "crazy liberal ideas". Ideas can't hurt us, so why don't we do research and then accept or discount the ideas based on their actual merit?

I've been reading books like, In Defense of Food by Michael Pollan, and Animal Vegetable Miracle by Barbara Kingsolver, and watching documentaries like Botany of Desire and Food Inc..

I gow a garden in the summer, and can as much food as possible for winter use. I raise chickens for eggs (if they'd start laying again), and I try to eat real food as much as possible, though we do still eat convenience foods more than I'd like.

I've been thinking more and more about living in a sustainable way, and the changes I would have to make are scary, but I think they're scary because we've grown up thinking that the way things are are the only way.

What do we do when we can't go to costco and buy a jumbo bag of frozen chicken breast? It sometimes feels easier to live in ignorance of where your food comes from, because once you've seen it, it's a lot harder to continue eating it.

I've joined the coupon craze, though mostly for non-food items since we don't eat a lot of the things there are coupons for (though I got a great deal on walnuts and butter and now have a nice supply in my freezer), but even for things like razors, I've had feelings of guilt for quite some time. I can get razors for free, but not the extra blades, so to never pay for razors we'd end up throwing away entire razors every time the blade goes dull. It's hard to balance the desire for a years supply of all things and still not be part of a rampant consumerism culture.

There are lots of things to think about, but in thinking about starting small, I'm researching how I can avoid eating commercialized meats. Being taught not to waste things, we'll finish up the bag of frozen chicken in the freezer over the next couple of months, and hopefully by then I'll have ideas on where to buy chicken that was raised in a sustainable way, that is healthy for me, for the farmers, and for the planet. I'll also look into the milk I buy and decide if I need to pay more for organic milk, and if that means that we'll be drinking less of it. And, if my chickens don't start laying again, I'll be looking into cruelty free eggs.

I know all of this sounds crazy to some people, but I feel strongly that we humans were placed on the earth to be wise stewards over all things, and I can't justify supporting companies that don't care if they're making us sick, or if their chicken farmers are developing allergies to antibiotics because of their overuse in the chickens, or workers on a killing floor who lose their fingernails to infections, or who care more about their bottom lines than about people dying from e coli poisoning.

UPDATE:

I'm adding links to locally grown/sustainable farms as I find them. The one I have so far is Christiansen's Hog Heaven, which sells heritage breed pigs all processed and delivered in little packages. We're ordering a whole pork and splitting it among family.

10%

Buy Local Week starts next saturday, November 29th and runs through December 6th. Local First, a non profit organization supporting local businesses suggests shifting just 10% of your purchases to locally owned stores. That 10% can make a huge difference in our local economies.

Why is shopping local so important?

From the Local First website:
Locally owned, independent businesses reflect the character of our communities. Owners of local businesses live here. They are our neighbors. Their products and services support and sustain the needs of our residents, and they play a vital role in our social networks. In fact, local businesses mirror who we are and what we value as a community. They help to create a sense of place. Emerging research demonstrates that local and independent businesses generate more than three times the return to our local economies than do national chain stores. This is because business owners typically purchase support services (marketing, accounting, legal, design) from local firms and are often better employers, who pay living wages and offer benefits. Additionally, profits from local businesses tend to stay in our communities. Local businesses offer the greatest opportunities for jobs, innovation, and other community contributions, which improve the quality of life for local residents. Over the last several years, global trends and market forces have resulted in consolidation, mergers, and acquisitions in many business sectors. Growth among mass merchandisers, internet retailers, and big-box stores, ultimately reduces the selection and diversity of products and services available in our communities. With such intense competition, the market share of goods and services sold by local and independent businesses has eroded, in some cases, dramatically. Many communities and countless urban and rural main streets that only a few short years ago featured thriving local- business districts are now in decline. The result is less choice for consumers, a growing sameness of design, of products, and of services, less opportunity for innovation, fewer living-wage scale jobs and reduced reinvestment back into our community. Decaying main streets and homogenized neighborhood commercial zones are blighting many communities and taxpayers struggle to reclaim the vitality and the culture that these businesses helped to support.

Shop Local

This past Saturday my Mister and I did a little shopping. We needed some tools, so we went to Ace Hardware in North Salt Lake. They had just about everything we needed, and what they didn't have, they ordered for us, no extra charge. Plus, they gave us the online price on one tool, which saved us nearly $10 on it.

In talking to one of the owners, we learned that sales are down $50,000 this month compared to the same time last year. Partly the economy, people just aren't spending as much (which is a good thing, IMO) but largly because of Lowes. I've been to lowes, but when I think about what kind of community I want to live in, I picture small, locally owned stores where people know what they're selling.

Next time you need something for a home improvement project, or a kitchen item (they have an impressive selection of kitchen tools), or if you want to take a class on decorating or cooking, check out Ace before you try a big box store. Support our community.

(I also have to add, that I saw a special brownie pan that makes every piece an edge- I've said for years that there ought to be one, and now there is. I almost bought it (two actually), maybe next time.)

The Spending Bug

Sometimes when I'm disappointed about something, or bored, or for any other unknown reason, I get the urge to spend money. My preferences are ebay, ksl classifieds, and shade clothing.

I'm doing really well sticking to my budget so I can save up for a new washing machine (mine is still dying slowly), then save for a new car (we're looking at a Rav4 in 4 years, unless something better comes along). The long-term things I'd like to save for are somewhat helpful to avoid online shopping binges, but don't get rid of them altogether.

Currently I'd like to buy some bulk legos on ebay for the kids for christmas, and some wood working tools for A for his birthday or christmas, a bike from ksl classifieds for J, plus the Kiva micro loans are a little addicting, so it's not like I'm wanting to spend money on wasteful things. I guess when I can get those things they'll be even more meaningful.

How do you avoid online shopping binges?

Kiva Microloans

If you are interested in donating, make sure to join the Feminist Mormon Housewives team first, so your donation counts on their total donations.

Why I'm a Democrat

A new reader, Carissa (welcome to my blog by the way...) asked me to make a case for being a democrat, since she didn't find my balance argument convincing, citing that there are too many mormons in Utah and that half of us should convert to catholicism. I think that is different, because the church does not run the government (for the most part...I acknowledge that some will disagree). I also want to note that in most cases, I typed my views before reading the entire party platform, so although there are some phrases that are the same, it wasn't intentional.

A lot of the reasons why I have chosen to be a democrat have to do with my religious beliefs. I believe that we were given the earth to live on and to be stewards over. That means that we must act responsibly and conserve resources, avoid polluting and otherwise harming the earth as far as is possible. I also believe that we were meant to enjoy the beauty around us and that there needs to be balance as far as land use goes. My Mister, for example, loves to ride dirt bikes. I think it's good that he is able to go out with his brothers and cousins and do something that they all enjoy together. I also think (and he agrees) that he needs to stay on set trails to protect the rest of the land. The world is not his to ride rampantly over. The Utah D. Platform says the following:

Natural Resources: Utah Democrats seek to ensure the protection of public health and create a legacy of clean, safe air, soil and water, and a sustainable and balanced plant and animal wildlife population... We place great value on conserving our diverse natural resources and public lands that belong to all the citizens and future generations...Utah Democrats support the protection of wilderness with the right of access to use it responsibly as well as acting to help preserve critical wildlife habitat. Multiple uses of the public lands in sustainable ways are encouraged.

I believe that we have a duty to care for those who are not as fortunate as ourselves. I don't believe in perpetual welfare, and think that we need to help people learn to help themselves. I think our current welfare policy makes it nearly impossible for anyone to overcome their current circumstances, creating the cycle of poverty. The state platform says...

Utah Democrats believe that all Utahns should labor to the best of their abilities to provide for themselves and their families. In return, employers should pay a decent, life-sustaining wage and appropriate benefits or taxpayers unfairly end up subsidizing those employers who fail to meet these standards... Utah Democrats support programs for low-income working families that break the cycle of poverty, reward industry, promote self-sufficiency, support parenting, and encourage
families to stay together. We also believe that government must continue to provide assistance to the low-income disabled and elderly members of our society who cannot provide for themselves.

I think that laws which attempt to push those in the country illegally to other areas are cruel and ineffective. I think that people should be here legally, but that our policies have created the current mess. I think that there needs to be away to allow those here illegally to pay a fine, or do some kind of community service, and then allow them to get work permits. The state platform says:

Utah Democrats strongly affirm that people who are in the United States should be here legally. We strongly encourage Congress to adopt humane and compassionate policies that control our borders while providing for a viable worker immigration policy that respects the contributions of these workers to our economy and their families and children, many of whom are United States citizens. This policy must not lead to programs of exploitation with employers engaging in a pattern and practice of recruiting undocumented workers, and must include whistleblower protections. We abhor the demonization and politicization – with undercurrents of racism – that has inhibited rational, fair-minded debate of the issue.

As far as health care goes, I think all people should have access to healthcare, and that medical bills should not be causing people to file for bankruptcy. While I have no problem with doctors making a good wage, I think a health care system based on making profit is reprehensible. From the state platform:

Utah Democrats seek solutions to our ongoing healthcare crisis. We affirm that accessible healthcare is a civil right; no person should be denied access to basic and adequate healthcare. It is a national disgrace that the United States lags behind every other developed country in caring for the medical needs of its citizens. It is unconscionable that thousands of Utahns suffer or even die only because they lack access to adequate medical care and that those numbers continue to rise.

I don't think that prayers in schools are appropriate, and it always seems weird to attend a government type meeting and have people pray first. I'm okay with it as long as all religions are allowed to participate equally, but I would prefer a moment of silence where people can pray or not according to their religion. I like what the state platform says about it...

Utah Democrats believe that the constitutional principle of separating church and state maintains the rights of all Americans to worship how, where, and what they may.

We don't need to ban the practice of religion in public, we just need to be respectful, especially in utah, of people who do not share in the predominant religion.

It seems that there are two issues which keep most utahns from affiliating with the democratic party. Same sex marriage, and abortion. Same sex marriage isn't likely to be an issue in Utah any time soon. We already have a state constitutional amendment defining marriage, and I think the only way it might become an issue is if the federal government forced the state to change, in which case, it wouldn't matter what party you affiliated with. With abortion, I think we should do more to educate (Our current sex education isn't working, and I'm not sure if we could do more to teach parents how to talk to their kids, or if public schools need to expand their program) and prevent, then there would not be so much demand for abortions. I personally think that abortions should only be considered in cases of rape or incest, where the woman did not choose to put herself in the position where she might become pregnant, or in cases where the life of the mother is in danger, and I know many utah democrats feel the same way. The Utah Democratic party has a big tent that allows for differing views. The state platform says:

Utah Democrats believe in a comprehensive approach that protects reproductive freedom while fostering personal responsibility and education for thoughtful and moral decisions about sexuality, childbearing, adoption, and parenting.

I know people who are locally democrats, but still vote for republicans nationally because of those two issues.

I'll end with a quote that I think exemplifies the problems with our lopsided government: The state Republican party platform says:

We demand honesty, integrity, morality, and accountability of our public officials. We will work to expose and stop corruption.

Because of the inbalance, we have dishonesty, lack of integrity, immorality, and zero accountability in many of our public officals. There is no one to keep them in check, and I really think they've become power hungry and are abusing that power.

I also recommend readingThis article.

Loyalty or Balance

I've been thinking a lot about loyalty lately. What are we loyal to and why? I've always considered myself a loyal person. Maybe too loyal. I had a really difficult time switching preschools that my son will go to in the fall, because the first one was where my older son went, and had a wonderful experience, so I feel like I need to be loyal to her, even when a preschool opened within walking distance (as opposed to a 10 minute drive each way). So loyal, that when I finally did switch my son to the new preschool, in my guilt over leaving the first preschool, I may have said something that hurt the new preschool teacher's feelings. Hopefully not, but I'm not sure...

As a democrat, I'm having a difficult time understanding the hardcore loyalty that so many republicans seem to have to their party. In Utah, I think it's obvious that the one-party-super-majority system we have going on is not healthy, but still people seem to think that the next conservative republican will be better than the previous one.

I'm trying to imagine if I would feel the same way about the democrats if it were they who had a supermajority stranglehold on our government, but I'm just not seeing it. As far as politics go, my loyalty is to the well being of my community, my state, my nation, and this planet we call home, er.... earth.

I double dog dare (ooohhhhhh) any of you republicans who HAVE NOT already thought about the problems associated with a supermajority to do so, and to consider voting D this november (at least locally).

For some reason a supermajority has turned basically good people (I'm giving many of them the benefit of the doubt) into what appears to be arrogant, power hungry idiots (some just arrogant, some just idiots...). I can appreciate the desire to be loyal, but I think sometimes we need be careful of what we are loyal to, and make sure that there is balance and moderation.

Consumerism

This time of year I always think I have too much "stuff". This year, it's epsecially sad that I think I have too much "stuff", since the majority of my "stuff" is packed away in boxes waiting to be able to move into new "stuff" (aka "new house").

My Mr. and I are having a contest to see how long we can go without spending any money. It's proving to be difficult though, since yesterday we had to go buy a new bike helmet to replace the one that santa brought our 3-year-old (the one who apparently does not have a 3-year-old sized head). I don't count that since we returned something first.

Today we have to buy some trim to finish up a bit of molding in our old house that is still unfinished (anyone want to buy a house with some minor finish work to do on the trim?).

It seems never ending, this need to acquire more stuff. In my need to compartmentalize things, I'm temped to stop buying anything made in China. That accomplishes two things- less chance of lead in our "stuff" and stops supporting a country which is still (I believe) the worlds top polluter. It's hard to have principles like that when you have children. Sorry kids, no more matchbox cars for you, they're made in china. Sorry kids, you'll have to play with these crude wooden cars that I fashioned out of old twigs. That doesn't sound so bad to me, but my kids are having a hard time not buying into whatever commercial they see on TV (maybe we need a TV made out of twigs).

I guess we do what we can, but I have to say that the best gift any of my sons received for christmas was the small wooden saw that my dad made (with my 3-year-old helping) the day after christmas.

The Least of These

My heart aches for people who, for whatever reason, are without a warm place to sleep, a place to feel safe this winter. Sometimes it feels overwhelming that there are so many people who are in need of help. I can't fix much of anything for these people.

The North Salt Lake City Youth Council is holding a drive to benefit the Road Home. They are collecting blankets (any size), bath towels, gloves, hats, and other items.

Fleece blankets are on sale 3 for $9.99 at Albertsons, and I understand that Family Dollar has similarly priced blankets.

Donations can be left at the NSL City building (20 South HWY89, North Salt Lake), or can be dropped off to me (email me at alliegator321atgmaildotcom).

It may not be much, but maybe a warm blanket will bring some comfort to those who have so little.

To the Women of the Church

From President HInckley:

Some years ago President Benson delivered a message to the women of the Church. He encouraged them to leave their employment and give their individual time to their children. I sustain the position which he took.

Nevertheless, I recognize, as he recognized, that there are some women (it has become very many in fact) who have to work to provide for the needs of their families. To you I say, do the very best you can. I hope that if you are employed full-time you are doing it to ensure that basic needs are met and not simply to indulge a taste for an elaborate home, fancy cars, and other luxuries. The greatest job that any mother will ever do will be in nurturing, teaching, lifting, encouraging, and rearing her children in righteousness and truth. None other can adequately take her place.

It is well-nigh impossible to be a full-time homemaker and a full-time employee. I know how some of you struggle with decisions concerning this matter. I repeat, do the very best you can. You know your circumstances, and I know that you are deeply concerned for the welfare of your children. Each of you has a bishop who will counsel with you and assist you. If you feel you need to speak with an understanding woman, do not hesitate to get in touch with your Relief Society president.

To the mothers of this Church, every mother who is here today, I want to say that as the years pass, you will become increasingly grateful for that which you did in molding the lives of your children in the direction of righteousness and goodness, integrity and faith. That is most likely to happen if you can spend adequate time with them.

For you who are single parents, I say that many hands stand ready to help you. The Lord is not unmindful of you. Neither is His Church.

May He bless you, my beloved sisters who find yourselves in the situation of single parenthood. May you have health, strength, vitality to carry the heavy burden that is yours. May you have loving friends and associates to bear you up in your times of trial. You know the power of prayer as perhaps few others do. Many of you spend much time on your knees speaking with your Father in Heaven, with tears running down your cheeks. Please know that we also pray for you.

Do the best we can, we know our circumstances, the Lord is mindful of us all. Read Sister Beck's talk, see what you can take from it to grow and learn, but know that God is mindful of us. Know that he wants us to do our best, not more than we are able. He loves us and doesn't want us to drown in the despair which satan would sneak into our minds.

Man (and woman) is, that he (and she) might have joy.

Blame the Men!

Continuing off of my last post about Sister Julie Beck's conference talk, Women Who Know, I'd like to talk a little bit more about why it is that so many women feel overwhelmed by what they view their roles as being as a woman in the church, and no I'm not blaming the men (entirely anyway).

Conner Boyack has a post right now that talks about the role of men in the family. After reading from an article by Brent Barlow, he says, Barlow notes several trends that are still (if not more so) applicable 35 years later. One such trend is the diminishing of the role of fatherhood in the family. A prime example of this situation is found in modern sitcoms that revolve around a family. Whether it be The Simpsons, Everybody Loves Raymond, Family Guy, or Home Improvement, the father is portrayed as a witless buffoon. He is just another one of the children that the wife/mother has to look after and care for. If women are viewing their husbands as an extra child to clean up after and care for, no wonder so many of us are feeling overburdened and under-appreciated.

I'm blessed to be one of six sisters-in-law in my husband's family. While this may not always be easy for our mother-in-law, it is wonderful for us to get together and share joys and frustrations (especially where many are the same), over Thanksgiving the we talked about the need to ask our husbands to watch the kids. I talked about it more with my parents recently and they have experienced something similar. Fathers, when they have an activity they want to take part in, have a much easier time going and participating. Mothers in similar situations either end up taking children with them, or asking fathers to watch the children, because it is assumed that the mother is the main caretaker. In the discussions with my sisters-in-law we one of us mentioned how her husbands first thoughts when planning anything revolve around his needs, and he's not doing that to be selfish, at least not intentionally, while her thoughts revolve around how the activity will affect the children.

How do we get to where we are truly equal partners? Equal doesn't mean that we do all the same things. Connor quotes Elder Oaks saying, "The family proclamation gives this beautiful explanation of the relationship between a husband and a wife: While they have separate responsibilities, “in these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners". I think equality means that we recognize each other as having equal worth and value in our separate responsibilities (and by separate responsibilities I am referring to however a couple has worked things out for themselves).

I truly don't mean to male bash. I have a wonderful husband who does so much to make my life easier. I think, most of the time, we have things right. We're partners working together trying to get through life as easily and happily as possible. I do think that men and women need to be careful and make sure they are sharing the burdens and the joys that come along with raising a family in the church.

Us and Them

I was reading this article on MSNBC about Nancy Pelosi and Iraq financing and troop withdrawl and thought to myself, how did we get this way? The House wants one thing, the president vetoes it, half of the senate wants to pass something, and the other half does all they can to block it. Why do we pay these people?

I'm registered as a democrat. I have family who are registered as republicans. Does it really matter? No one is ever going to agree with another person on 100% of issues 100% of the time, but partisan fighting does nothing to improve our country, or make life easier for the citizens here.

We can disagree on issues and how issues ought to be handled, but when the disagreeing prevents us from getting anything done, it's time to watch Mr. Rogers reruns and learn how to compromise and work together.

It seems like it's time to stop worrying about labels and start worrying about the health and safety of people.

Not one more son...

In today's Tribune (I guess the article was published on the 12th, but I read online...) there is an editorial titled Iraq is not worth the sacrifice on one more mother's child written by Kathleen Snyder. Her son was captured and executed after a January 20th attack in Karbala Iraq.

Last night my Mr. and I attended a farewell party for a family member who will be deployed soon. I fear for his safety and I am angered that he is being asked to go. We have very different views on the war and the current administration. He goes because he believes that he can make a difference, and he believes that the US has some sort of responsibility to the people there. I'm not sure exactly what he thinks that might be, and it seemed inappropriate to ask so instead, I wished him safety and said that we would have to have another party next summer, when he comes home.

I'm angry that so much is being asked of men and women and their families, for something that is so unnecessary. We were lied to about the reasons for the war, but each time a new reason is fabricated, so many choose to believe that it's a good reason. We must protect ourselves from the 9-11 terrorists, wait, no, we must stop Saddam and his weapons of mass destruction, wait, no, we must secure Iraq. I don't even know what the reason currently being given for the justification of sending people to fight and be injured or killed.

Kathleen Snyder ends her editorial with this: Death on the battlefields of Iraq does not compare to World War II. The sacrifices being made by American families are not in the proud tradition of generations fighting for their country. Only when all Americans realize the horror of Iraq, realize that the situation is not going to improve, and bring all combat troops home will there be peace for my family. Not until then can the American military be rebuilt to fight the true war on terror. Stop the insanity. Stop the war. Bring our troops home to defend America.

Letter from Moms for Clean Air

Hello Mamas-
after talking to dr. brian moench (founder of utah
physicians for a health enviroment), i have a better
sense of why wed's evening meeting in bountiful is
important for us, moms. in essence, the intermountain
power agency (IPA) is trying to finance its third
coal-fired power plant in delta by selling energy to
small out-of-state municipalities, such as wasco
county in oregon.

the reason why we need to show up at this meeting is
that this plant will be built in OUR state, WE will
suffer all of the toxic pollution consequences and
receive NONE of the energy generated, meanwhile,
orgeon gets cheap power at the expense of OUR
children's health. clearly, this is a moral and
ethical issue and as moms, we must stand up for our
children's right to breathe clean air.

the utah physicians for a healthy enviroment will be
speaking out against this proposed long-term contract
between wasco county, oregon and the intermountain
power agency at 7pm, may 9th at the west bountiful
city building (550 north 800 west): directions from
slc are as follows:

directions: going north on I-15, take the 400 north exit and go west over the highway. take
a right at the first stop sign. the city building is on your right
just after the school.

we hope to see you there -- and please spread the
word, especially to friends, familyand collegues in
the delta and bountiful area.

with warm wishes,

cherise udell
founder, utah moms for clean air
utahmomsforcleanair.org